It's getting too hot to function. Super humid hot hot. Sweaty under the boobs hot.
Me: Dude, it's like, 96 degrees here with full humidity.
Kristin: I'm wearing a fleece.
Also from Kristin, on an unrelated equally hot day: You need to update.
Hi.
I need deadlines and accountability. Hopefully Steve Pavlina is going to help me find direction in my life, beginning with (a) becoming an early riser and (b) finding my true purpose in twenty minutes or less. I'm happy to report that I got to work today at 9:30 instead of 10:15, and that I almost got up with the alarm at 7 (but not quite). Also, I did a full hour and 135 statements last night - under which circumstances I statistically should have found my calling, but the only thing that made me cry was when I wrote about my dad. (Go read the article). At least it's a start.
So my super fabulous other half is up in Vermont working for two weeks, and instead of sitting around complaining, I'm trying to do some structured me-time. Although it's a little tough to stay motivated in this forsaken heatwave, but I'm doing the best I can. Oh, that's some of the stuff I've come up with - the "true purposes" I'm circling around have something to do with living without regret or fear, treading softly on the earth, helping others, and sharing the wisdom and strength I've gained as a result. I just can't hone it in any further - I can, but I keep coming up with almost the same sentence - but I'll give it another crack tonight. Everyone that complained on the site basically stopped when he said they would, and didn't push through for more answers. His simple reply to them was that if they didn't cry, that they weren't done. I was able to fall asleep right when I went to bed last night, as well as think for a few minutes that I want to bring light to the dark corners and to share the pullings of my heartstrings with the world... those things that make me catch my breath, songs that make me sit on the floor and close my eyes, pictures that say everything without speaking - I want those things to fuel me along, and I want to share that passion with others. But that's still not making me cry.
Keep coming.
So much has happened in a few weeks' time, Raf and I almost bought a condo, but the sellers never called us. More accurately, the real estate agent for the sellers never called us after repeated attempts, offers, and messages. I'll take it as NGW but it's still frustrating... crap this keyboard is dirty. Oh, and we're in the new office at work, I got my first paying photography gig, I'm still broke but for some reason I'm not traumatized about it, and I found a great pen that I like to write with. Um... I almost fractured my pinky toe. And did I mention that it's hot? It's about all I can think of. I can't even turn on my stove. A whole bunch of stuff has gone on with my mom, but since she's as okay as she can be in this moment (and I'm not frustrated by the whole thing in this moment) I'm not going to dredge it up right now.
So, yeah - deadlines. Here's the short list:
1. Get my doctor's office to complete my medical transcripts so I can wrap up my application to Gateway - I'm on hold with them right now.
2. Figure out the photography job for the office - I have a meeting with Geoff on Thursday.
3. Update my blog - check.
4. Upload the shots I want for hotavocados - that should be done by tonight.
5. Get my oil changed - appointment set for Thursday
6. Pick out paint for the main room - having dinner with mom Thursday night and taking a trip to Home Depot.
7. Trader Joe's - check.
8. Maybe go consignment shop shopping for some cheap dressers (to get rid of the big bulky ones I have now).
9. CLEAN THE APARTMENT. Like, really clean, not maintenance clean. Which is going to be tough, because I start sweating just from making the bed. But it has to be done.
10. Make my deposit before Friday. I should be able to hack this one.
11. Talk to Kristin about font changes, etc. for site - in process.
12. Figure out my true purpose in life.
On top of all this, I haven't been writing nearly enough. And I'll sit down every now and then to get some stuff out, and I forgot how magical it gets - sometimes it's good. Really good. And there's only a few months until NaNoWriMo, so I've got to get back in the habit... soon. I'll start with daily updates, even if I have nothing to say. I need a life supervisor. Like, someone breaking my balls all the time about cleaning my room or doing my homework - you think that stuff would have stuck from back then. It didn't. Please give me a hard time about living up to my full potential! My inner teenager will simultaneously adore you and despise you for it.
And the other stuff on the list - which is work. Which I should be doing since I'm here and all. So that's it for now.
Love and deadlines,
~VVB
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